Oh God, 2026

So, it is now January 2024, oh Jesus, nope it's 2026. I knew that. But my hands just went to write 2024. Anyway. I got a notification about my kickstarter and I looked back at the updates I made and I felt yet again the same sense of gratitude, awe, and inspiration that I had then. I'm sure poeple dont really talk like this but looking back I am just so impressed by who I was when I made these posts. I am always surprised by how well spoken I was. I don't know why I don't believe it. I guess maybe because I've also looked back and been like Jesus Christ who even let me into college. It's so weird how I can both be insanely eloquent and wise, and moving, and then also write something that totally doesn't encapsulate anything or who I am.

My point with all of this is, writing for me isn't necessarily about saying something world-changing, but to encapsulate the person I am or the thoughts I have. Seeing these Kickstarter Updates made me sad that I didn't continue to do that within the realm of Smash Up. I think at the time I felt like I finally had set the business up and there was no more updates to make after that point. But that's not true at all. I loved reading my little yearly update. It was like a Smash Up Wrapped 2022. Everyone loves those and the statistics are so fun. So I want to keep doing that.

Yet, I have apprehension to it too, because as I've continued this business for the past 4 years, the more it's become really centered around me. That was never my purpose. (Okay, maybe Year 1 it was – As in, like, advancing my initial passion). But really, I want Smash Up to be something that is run by college students or local community members. I want it to be larger than me. So making these updates seems to center me again. I want the truck to be something people can come in and use to further their own lives financially, socially, or spiritually. That's what I say to everyone I hire. This isn't about working for me or furthering MY vision or MY legacy. This is for you. Obviously, we have a certain vibe and culture that all funnels into what makes us successful, so we can't lose that part of it. There has to be some aesthetic through line. But I want people to own it as much as I do. And use their own authenticity to add to the complexity of the culture of the truck. Theres only 3 people back there at a time, cooking. So, each person matters a huge amount, and I want them to feel like they matter. And know it too.

I've reached the stage in the business where I'm ready for other people to take it on without me. It's set up now and I want future ambitious kids to take on the learning experience and make their mark. It's hard to find people like that though. Last year was about letting it go to other people and that proved difficult. I know how much I matter to this business, so I'll be there for it going forward, but I'm starting to operate at a distance. I want people to be as stoked to see the new hire, as they do me. Or the veteran, or whoever else has made their mark on this little community we have.

And I'm sure a lot of the charm in the beginning was the fact that we were figuring it all out, so I don't want to lose that. It's a much different feeling to be the owner of something and an employee. "Oh, it's just a job", "Oh I'm just furthering someone else's dream." And I don't know how to get rid of that feeling for people. I don't want people to feel that way about this job. From my perspective, I'm kind of like, we literally don't have to do this. I can walk away at any moment. So if it continues, it's because someone (aside from me) wants it to continue. The employees want it to continue. That's the same mindset over the job as I have. I want people to be stoked to be here and that the get to run their own thing (Even if they didn't invent it). Inventing it was fucking tough man idk Plus, I didn't invent burgers, so you don't have to invent the business, in order to feel a sense of ownership about your work. You'll gain skills working here and that knowledge you'll have ownership over. Do you not feel ownership over the things you learn because you weren't the one to discover it?

...

I do these blog posts not because it's apart of the job or I think it's going to make me money, hell no. I'm doing this because I want to document my story and the story of the group we create. How cool would it be to see future employees making blog posts like this, or take control of the yearly recaps. And not because it's "assigned work" but because it's pretty fucking cool to make stuff and feel like there's a platform for your voice. So, to the future employee, who says "blogging isn't in my job description", c'mon man, live a little. Or like little TikToks or videos we get to make, it's a way to make your mark and feel like you matter. Documenting history, idk. The same thing I said before is true about these. If we don't want to do them, they won't exist. Who cares. They don't matter to the business, and I don't particularly feel like paying people to do this. So, we don't have to do it. But what a missed opportunity if we gave it up.

The next few updates I'm going to catch us back up with the yearly recaps. I did 2022, year one. But, now I'm going to do 2023, 2024, and 2025. Looking back, I realized how wrong I was in thinking that I was done with the updates, after completing the first year. And I can't wait to tell you everything we learned.

Matthew Beagan